When we suffer loss, life often pushes us to resume our normal daily activities quickly without adequate time to grieve deeply and address the personal loss. It can create havoc when you push grief and loss aside as it can show up not only as physical pain, but as so many other disguised things: unexplained emotional outbursts, addictive habits, troublesome relationships, anger, depression, and anxiety.

In times of loss, we are mourning the loss of connection – to the person, the relationship and the context where within the grief now lives. Grief has unexpected triggers. One minute we will be okay, and the next the most insignificant thing can trigger an unexpected outpouring of raw grief, leaving us feeling unhinged and exhausted. Resulting in gripping control over the emotions ever tighter and pushing grief even further into the unconscious where it can create a great deal of discomfort. Grief Counselling can provide a safe space to process the emotions and the pain of the loss and process the loss of connection you are facing.

Have you lost someone dear to you? Are you finding it difficult to go on with your life? Don’t know how to move on and still honour the person you have lost? Feelings of grief and loss can be complicated because it is not just a single emotion, but often reflects unresolved feelings tied to complex relationships and dynamics. It can feel crushing, and many choose to let it go unaddressed. However, over time, unresolved grief can lead to mental health challenges and in this blog, we are discussing the ways unprocessed grief can harm body and mind.

LOOK OUT FOR THE FOLLOWING SIGNS OF UNPROCESSED GRIEF!
Don’t ignore the Physical Signs: Many might be unaware of it, but grief can have physical effects. Unprocessed grief sits in the unconscious and can cause somatic challenges like stomach aches, headaches, fatigue, brain fog, trouble sleeping, or sudden changes in appetite. It is the body’s way of telling that something is not right. Unprocessed grief puts immense stress onto the system, and the body pays the price quietly. The emotional pain manifests as symptoms that if not address can have long-term physical effects on our health.

Emotions are Out of Control: When grief is ignored, the emotions becomes denied or distorted into something else and can become unpredictable. Tears can come without any reason, you may get enraged at the most trivial issues, and irritability can take over daily life. People may feel emotionally raw and exhausted. This is where working through the grief in therapy can work wonders … you get a space to let these feelings out safely, understand and
process them, and learn how to manage these emotional outbursts without hurting oneself or others.

Unhealthy dependencies: People find different numbing ways to avoid experiencing the unresolved grief they experience. These self-soothing behaviours uses other things to find numbness in food, alcohol, drugs, sex, phone scrolling, and shopping. These coping strategies may feel like relief but only deepens the problem. It is a maladaptive coping strategy that will cause secondary harm if left unchecked.

Relationships Under Strain: When you are living with unprocessed grief, you may find it hard to connect with others. Your numbness may interfere with your ability to connect to close loved ones and even friends. If this pattern continues for too long, friends and family may start to feel shut out, and conversations may feel impossible. Loneliness grows as disconnection continues. It sometimes feel impossible to restore what you had before the loss. Working with a counsellor can be the best way to get back the ability to connect, communicate, and maintain meaningful relationships even during difficult times.

Mental Health Issues: Ignoring grief for a long time can give rise to various mental health issues like depression and anxiety, anger, resentment and bitterness, as well as hopelessness. We can get stuck in negativity.

A SOLUTION IN A NUTSHELL!

If you have lost a loved one, whose absence makes life feel like living in a void and you are unable to bear your unresolved grief on your own any longer, reach out today. At Elmarie Bekker Counselling, we specialize in helping clients process their grief and loss by creating a space where clients feel safe enough to explore their life story with all its highlights and losses. We will assist in making sense of the loss whilst finding ways to honour those we have lost. We will develop strategies on how to go on and live full and happy lives. Take the first step towards healing, and finding peace, hope, and a way to carry your loved one in your heart with honour and resolution whilst also being able to move on with life. Contact Elmarie today.